meeting

The guitar player in one of Sean's bands is one of the best players I've ever heard.  Ever.  My plan has been to work on my music and playing out for a few years and then work up the nerve to ask him to play with me.    he plays almost every night of the week and does lots of session work.  He's a busy guy and he's an amazing guy so I didn't want to bring anything to him that wasn't really ready (for his sake and mine). He beat me to it and offered to play with me.

I'm overwhelmed and delighted and terrified.  We're meeting today and I'm sick about it.  I didn't sleep much last night, our meeting is 5 hours away and I'm already shaking.  I don't want to ruin this opportunity.  I don't want him to think I'm awful.  And when I get this nervous I am awful.  My hands don't work and I fumble around on the guitar like I've never held one before.  My voice goes flat and gets squeaky.  I forget words and I choke.  I just choke.  It's terrible and embarrassing and it has happened too many times for me not to worry it will happen again. It still happens sometimes when I'm playing for my husband.  Bad.

So part of me wants to tell him it's too soon but another part of me can't wait to get it over with.  I don't know what's best.  I guess I won't know until it's too late.

Wish me luck.